Most of my life I struggled with setting limits to make space for myself. One might have gone so far as to call me a workaholic. I loved diving into new projects and watching goals become reality, but often found myself stressed to the point of illness. In short, I was killing myself, and I didn't even have much to show for it.
I met Colene Elridge, known to some of you as “Coach Colene”, through a group I co-founded called “Not The Only One In The Room (NTOO)”. The group, specifically designed for Women of Color in Lexington, KY and surrounding areas to network and uplift one another, began with 5 women and now boasts over 700 members. We host quarterly brunches, book clubs, and special events. But, our claim to fame is the way we support one another’s projects with our presence or our checkbook.
I asked Coach Colene if she would host one of her famous workshops for NTOO on any topic she desired. She agreed, and in one hour, everything changed.
“When are you your best self?” she asked us.
I had never thought about when I am my best, I just knew I was striving to be my very best daily. But never had I been asked to identify and then recorded what that looked like. She used what she described as a small example of what she meant.
“One of the ways I know I am my best self is when I floss three times per day. My smile is important to me and so is my dental health. If I am too busy and exhausted to make room for flossing, I am not necessarily reaching my ideal self.”
She then set the timer, and asked us to come up with 5 of them.
I wrote:
When I am cooking fresh foods and making healthy choices.
When I make time to exercise.
When I get enough rest.
When I spend time with my best friend of 28 years who lives 8 hours away.
When I don’t have to feel like I am recovering from my life when I take a vacation.
Coach Colene then asked us to pick our top 3 and work on those as our goals over the next year, giving us critical tools for success.
And everything changed for me. Suddenly, self-care and rest became priorities and with a reduction in stress, my work took on a new life. I was walking more in joy and intentionality than scrambling to get it all done. Lastly, a few times a year, my best friend and I meet up for getaways to keep our connection strong and invest in our friendship.
Last year, I took some of my co-laborers to Coach Colene’s Empowher Conference and we were blown away! We discussed our focus as a team and were able to shift our priorities and reach our goals quickly, while making room for rest and community care.
Empowher is back and I can’t wait to see what I will learn this time, from this dynamic speaker who not only inspires, but provides practical tools to get where you want to go.
Join me and change your life too!